ethics around love workings
Updated: Feb 15, 2022
To bind or not to bind, that is the question!

My simple answer is NO.
But to each their own.
Shadow Work is a constant, lifelong process...look within and assess how projections of neglect, abandonment or other types of trauma may be informing your reasons for certain types of love workings (i.e. Domination Workings)...do you really need them if they don’t show up for you? Why do you feel like you MUST have them in your life? I always tell folks to prioritize learning to love being in their OWN space and embracing their unique attributes that set them apart. Build your confidence up in your SELF and this kind of charisma is what will attract the lover that's perfect for you.
Rejection is not as personal as it feels. Liking someone or being liked is more about compatibility than inherent worth.
- Wise Words from Pharoah Kyle
You also don’t know what kinds of spirits people have on their side and they may not take well to trying to be dominated.
I prefer working with 𝙑𝙀𝙉𝙐𝙎 and using planetary magick if I'm doing any type of planetary work. I never do workings to break up a relationship or convince someone against their will to pursue me. You never really know WHO someone is, and I believe that it's just best to let your Spirit Guides do that work. If somebody wants to be with you, they WILL most definitely show you.
Let them come to you by their own volition!
- Keyoncé
Context on the photo from above

The photo above is from Kevin Gate's "Fatal Attraction" music video. In the video, he portrays women using hoodoo and spellwork to entice and bind men to be attracted to them forever in a zombie-like state, after they eat a spaghetti dish with red sauce.
The Voodoo'n Red Sauce
This kind of lore is very popular in the Caribbean, as well as down here in New Orleans (which they say is the northern most city of the Caribbean).
Down here in New Orleans there is a Hoodoo/ Voodoo popular myth that women used menstruation blood as a way to bind men and make them stay at the house to remain committed to them. In my opinion, it's not actually myth lol because that has been a common practice in terms of uses for menstruation blood, and there are many other uses for it, too.

Let's look at this from a cultural-historical context, women often times needed to depend on men for economic stability due to laws that restriction women's movement throughout society. I believe that is most likely why the myth could have spread, and also stigma against more "spiritual" than religious black women.
Due to this myth, many folks stray away from adding red sauce to gumbo and sometimes will raise an eyebrow if they know that it contains it. It's all myth though and could be seen as a way to undermine Black and Creole women's status of the time.
What do you think?
Photo from Mariposa Farms